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Thursday, July 1, 2010

Its all about you


I don’t usually dream about my husband, and the very few chances that I do. I always dream of us fighting over a girl or me getting jealous over a girl. That has been the dreams I get in the rare occasions that I dream about him.


Last night was different. My daughter had a fever and I was taking care of her, she wakes up every 30 minutes and I wake up when she does, so I am not well rested. My last falling asleep moment was already morning today and it was the best sleep I’ve had in 7 months because I dreamt of my husband and It was a good dream.


The setting of the dream was I was asleep and about to wake up. The first time I opened my eyes in my dream the room seemed empty except for my dream self lying on the bed. I closed my eyes. There were noises in the room and I opened my eyes only to find my husband and my daughter playing. Noel was wearing a green shirt and a black shorts and Nike was in her pajamas. They were laughing and having fun. In my dream I knew that Noel was only there for vacation but I was so happy. There was a brightness in my heart that only Noel can bring, and I can even hear my dream-self think: “is this real? is he really here? after the long wait is he really with us?”


I didn’t touch him though, he didn’t even look at me, he continued playing with Nike, and the dream Nike was so happy, they both looked so happy and so light that it filled my heart with joy just watching them, I didn’t join them, I just continued watching. Taking in every detail of their play, as if my dream-self knew that I need to remember the moment because it was only a dream. The moments in my dream seemed to last the whole day, they played together, laughing and giggling and me just watching. It was a fine day.


But like all dreams I had to wake up. I never got to touch my husband in my dream, but I felt more satisfaction in watching him with my daughter, it completed me, it filled a void in my heart just knowing he was there.


When I woke up, I almost did not remember I dreamt of him because of the abruptness of my awakening. It took me an hour to remember that I dreamt about him, and when I finally did, it placed a smile on my lips knowing he was here with his daughter, with me, playing and laughing even if it was just in my dreams. I was happy, because I know that I only need to wait a little longer and he will be visiting Nike and myself here in the Philippines for a few days, and I am excited to see Nike laughing and playing with his daddy again.

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